Humans Part II

Last night, my family participated in one of our frequent family activities – family movie night! We are fans of cinematography and love curling up on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and some chocolate milk for a few hours of escape into someone else’s false reality. Our dramatic piece in which we invested our time for the evening was The Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawn Treader.

*Commercial break - If you have not taken the time in your life to read the epic series written by the genius of C.S. Lewis, than stop right now and go to the library and begin. Better yet, click over to amazon and order it. It is worth the investment as you will pass it down from generation to generation in your family. The Chronicles of Narnia is a fantastic series written with phenomenal creativity and provocative verse that beckons to be read over and over again as each time the spirit of the Lord awakens within you the underlying story of His grace and mercy that Lewis so brilliantly presents without even a mention of Bible. This is mission work to the academic arena as all, believer or not, is attracted to this series and the nonbeliever receives the great story of Christ’s love without even realizing it! Amazing!

If you have not seen The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, I will try not to ruin the movie for you for I do want you to read it and see it. In this movie, the heroes are battling a villain that is capable to capitalize on your fears by morphing into your greatest fear and utilizing that to render you either helpless or subject to his service. During one scene, the villain morphs into a large sea monster and threatens to destroy their ship as one of the heroes allowed the thought of such fear to sweep through his mind at just the “wrong” time. Yet earlier in the movie, the villain creeps into the scene and attacks more subtly. A female hero, Lucy for all of you who have already seen the movie, is exposed to the possibility of altering her appearance to become more like her older sister whom she covets in beauty and maturity. Lucy does not sustain the spell, but does steal the page from a book so that she may experiment with it later on down the road. And yes, later on in the movie, she engages in this attempt once more and battles a stronger grip from the enemy.

This is yet another human quality that we all, ALL, possess. We have weaknesses, fears, and struggles. Do not think that you are exempt from the same experience that Lucy had. Satan is very determined to not allow you to be a part of the effective population. He wants you to be a part of the effected population that is contaminated and unable to do the work needed in order to further the kingdom of God and protect those who are in need of our strengths. Satan knows your EVERY weakness and if you do not stay on top of this, you will find yourself in the middle of the ocean fighting to swim before you even realized you were traveling on a boat that would lead you to this fate. Temptation is EVERYWHERE – even at church. No one is immune. Not one! You’re human. It is our job to love God and love people – the Jeremy Powell paraphrase of the greatest commandment (Mark 12: 28-34).

In order to love God, we must daily spend time with Him and get to know Him and learn from Him how to protect ourselves from the temptation to disengage slowly from an interwoven relationship with Him. God knows your weaknesses even more than Satan does. HE MADE YOU! He didn’t necessarily give you weaknesses, but HE DID give you strengths and He wants you to find them and use them!! It’s like exercise. The more you exercise, the stronger your body becomes and the weaknesses of your body are overpowered by the strengths.

In our developing of our strengths, we are also equipping ourselves to better love His creation, including others. If you are a believer, you might have experienced this. The closer you are in your relationship with God, the easier it is to love others, including the unlovable. You tend to exude greater patience with the rude and better tolerance for the manipulator and less disregard for the arrogant. You tend to find the good in you when noting the desirable attributes in others. You tend to love people and in that love you are pushed even harder to become stronger SO THAT you can prevent yourself from being brought down to the level of those you are loving…those that are in the mire and in need of rescue from the temptations and struggles. Before you can truly engage into battle and fight for the innocent, you have to be ready to go into combat. Know your weaknesses. Know where you can and cannot go and where you are effective. Know who your allies are and who possesses the strengths you do not have. Know when to walk away before you get sucked into the storm. Until you know, perhaps stay away.

I cannot fly a plane. Therefore, I am not even going to place myself in cockpit. If you cannot handle overspending, stay out of the mall and off of amazon. Make sense?

More tomorrow…God is good. He loves you so. God is BIG. We are small. Yet, He finds us where we are.

Humans Part I

Ah, the pinnacle of creation - man, and of course the finishing touch - woman. God created all of nature and decided on his final day of laborious work to form the human. It is unlike any other creation. It has strength and wisdom imparted from the Creator, yet it has fragility and delicacy also designed by the Almighty. And each one is so extremely different - even those whom are related and better yet, identical - something is distinctly different. Merriam-Webster defines the word human as susceptible to or representative of the sympathies and frailties of human nature. So even our scholarly world takes notice of the frailty and emotion that goes with the design.

Humans were not designed to simply evolve and coexist with the rest of creation (yes, I said evolve…more on that later). Humans were designed to dominate and rule the rest of creation with authority and power. Humans were designed to react to AND with creation as the world changes and ebbs and flows through progression and digression. Humans were designed to SURVIVE and to analyze, judge and decipher so that the best possible outcome can occur. Humans were designed to be plural meaning they were not meant to be alone or reclusive denying themselves the indulgence of relationships (yes, that too is plural). Humans were designed to disagree. Humans were designed to express emotion, and not just crying. Humans were designed to fear. Humans were designed to fight. Humans were designed to celebrate. Humans were designed to WORK. Humans were designed to rest. Humans were designed to be present.

Currently, I am reading through Isaiah and am in the great elongated prophecy of the detriment of the pinnacle of creation. Isaiah speaks of how the freedom and power given to the ultimate created being is abused, neglected, and thwarted. You see, man was created to desire a relationship. However, God grants us the freedom of where to focus that desire. His desire is for our desire to be Him. Yet, as we interact with His creation, our eyes become like that of a child in a candy store, or a grown man at the Bass Pro Shop. We see things that we wish to rule over. We see things with which we wish to establish relationships. We see things we desire to use for our benefit. We see things that threaten us. We see things that rise up envy.

God allows us to see all of His created glory – all of it. Right now, at this point in history, we can see farther into outer space than ever before – that is farther out into the creation resting in the palm of His hand. We can see deeper into the structure of the millions of cells that make up the inside of the pinnacle of creation. Grasp that! He has allowed man to peak behind the curtain of SELF. AND He has allowed man the material, wisdom, and ingenuity to pursue ways to combat flaws in His creation through research and modern medicine. God has allowed us to see the highest mountains and the deepest seas. God has allowed us to discover the numerous plants and animals that inhabit different regions of the earth and to understand the extinction of some and danger of others because of the ever evolving climates and territorial shifts. Even in my own yard, there are about 13 different blades of grass. GRASS, for crying out loud! He made it all and allows it to all exist and react to one another as He allows us to do the same.

We can learn so much from the rest of creation. For instance, when there is an absence of water – a drought – in an area, what happens? Plants die. Animals migrate or leave or die. And healing must take place before the land is restored to its original state; and sometimes it never is. A hungry predator moves into a region and destroys a population. The rest of the population both remains and endures the fear or it fleas forced to live somewhere that is unknown. An egg hatches and the hatchling struggles to emerge from the protective shell. If the struggle is prevented and assistance is given, than the hatchling is without the proper strength needed for survival.

Humans look at each other with covetous eyes and want. Humans look at a land or an area and decide that it is in “need” of their ruling authority. Humans determine relationships based on how that relationship will benefit their wellbeing, not a reciprocal nature. Humans neglect all other gifts and awareness of need in order to satisfy immediate desire. Humans fear being ruled and overpowered, so they fight to the detriment out of jealousy and insecurity. Humans detest loneliness and force relationships or pretend they need no one only to physically deteriorate. Like the area ridden with drought, your life can be lifeless without proper nourishment (spiritual, physical, mental, AND emotional). Like Scar and the Hyenas in the Lion King, if you find yourself too greedy and satisfying your desires to gluttonous levels, you will run out of necessities too soon. Like the hatchling, if you make life too easy, than you find yourself in situations where you are at the mercy of others and can be easily abused.

Isaiah spoke to the children of Israel giving them warning about their abuse of human freedom and where it was leading them. The prophecy that Isaiah delivers is one that does find itself fulfilled. However, I foresee this prophecy being fulfilled more than once. Each time I watch the news, or just people watch in public, I find myself wincing at decisions that are being made or the evidence of a previous decision made that is an exercise of the human freedom being abused. God allows it to compound itself for a duration of time before destruction and punishment and repentance and restoration occurs. I wince as I wait for the final straw and the smack down to begin. I wince as I know that every action I make in reaction to the rest of creation is so vital to assisting Him in redirecting His people back into His arms. I wince as I catch myself in covetous behaviors. I wince as I find realization of comparison and desire to be above the norm. I wince a lot.

Are you the pinnacle of creation? When others see you, do they find themselves keenly aware of who they are and where they can be in life with peace and contentment? Will others follow your leadership to a life established first in the greatest relationship? Or do they wish to compete with you? Do they wish to give or take? Work or be lazy? Love or hate?

What kind of human are you?

Sentiment v. Obsession

14. 6. 4. 3. 9. 4.

I play this game with friends of mine sometimes. Well, it isn’t a game. It is my toying with their memories and forcing them to make random connections with numbers and events. Today, these are the numbers of significance to me. I am packing my house to move. We will be changing states. We will sell our home and relocate to a rental as we embark upon a new journey. We will take with us necessity and probably then some. However, that is the problem. How much “then some”? We are a family of volume. No, I am not talking about people. There are currently 4 of us with 2 legs and 3 of us with 4 legs – this 4-legged number will most likely decrease upon moving day as well. Some of the members of the 2-legged collection are not a fan of the fluffy feline…so he might find a new place to purr.

Fourteen times I have packed my belongings and moved them. Fourteen times I have surmised the surroundings and determined what qualified as important enough to join me on the next leg of my journey. Fourteen times I have moved my closet. Fourteen times I have moved my cosmetics and favorite blankets. Fourteen times I have moved my pillow and books. Fourteen times I have redecorated and prioritized. Fourteen times, I have purged – Yes, believe it or not, each time, I do purge. But even though it sounds like we move as often as a military family, I still keep accumulating insurmountable piles of, well, crap.

I don’t think I am a hoarder, but I will definitely tell you that it is in my bloodline. Here is the thought process that goes through my twisted little mind. “Will I use this, need this, want this in the next home? How frequently have I used it in the past 2 years? If I have not used it, why? Will anyone else in the family benefit from it? Can I use it for an art and craft in the classroom or for my two children? Can I give it to anyone? Who? When? How?” I answer yes more often than I should. That is my problem.

Often, I have found myself keeping things with a great hope of adding it to a scrapbook. I have been married almost 14 years and my oldest is 9 years old. I desperately want to sit down and put together a draft of the life we have lived together thus far, but in 14 years, it has not happened. So, yep, I have tons of movie stubs, brochures from theme parks, arts and crafts, and more. My other problem with random piles of junk is my husband’s job status renders us paralyzed with fear from the tax world as he is self-employed so to speak. So I KEEP EVERYTHING that has to do with finances. I am petrified of not having proper documentation of the needed goods or proof.

And then there are sentimental items beyond Disney World fast passes and birthday cards. There are little kitchen gadgets bought by my mother for me before she passed. There are books given to me by students during student teaching. There are dresses I wore to a formal in college. There are knick knacks given to me by neighbor in years gone by. There are items constructed by a grandfather who has already reached glory. So the boxes stack and the boxes stack.

Purging is so necessary for forward progression. But what is kept? Sentimental items are always excusable, but you can make anything sentimental. I mean, what about that napkin you used last night while at dinner with your family. It was the napkin you used the last time your family ate at Zaxby’s on the last Wednesday in May at the end of their 3rd grade year. Ignore the honey mustard stains though because that only adds to the memories. I only tease as I have been there and am desperately trying to place myself on a therapeutic regiment of recovery.

As a family, we are relocating to house number 6, and I promise you it will not be our last. Did I mention that I have changed teaching classrooms 8 times in all of our moves? Just a few weeks ago, I filled 4 large garbage cans full of stuff and donated another 4 garbage cans worth of material to the rest of the faculty as I cleaned out my classroom for this new adventure. I still have a ton of boxes that I brought home with me. It is amazing how much you can accumulate in such a short amount of time.

We have nine days until we depart. In nine days, I am determined to prioritize what needs to be released for the betterment of other people. By donating my stuff to various charitable venues, I am allowing others to benefit from these items. That is one of the last questions I have recently added to my purging questionnaire. “By keeping this item in my possession and continuing to leave it unused, who am I failing to bless – or rather, allow God to bless – by allowing dust to settle upon it once more?”

But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in Him? 1 John 3:17

That is probably the most convicting one I force upon myself. You see, there is tons of scripture about storing up treasure here on earth, but it isn’t just about that. In our storing, what are we seeking to accomplish? If we are saving money to pay for college, than that is noble and worthy. If we are saving clothes to pass along to the next child as we wait for them to reach the size, than I see nothing wrong with that either. If you are saving a broken mixer or a dull knife simply because of the giver, why? If you are saving 4 pairs of the same black heels because each was bought for a different wedding you were chosen to participate, why?

Three piles are the suggested method for cleaning – keep, give, trash. I have 3 organizations that I have piles for, so my give stack alone is divided 3 ways. I have to do this for 4 different people as well.

Purging is also cleansing. It feels like weight being lifted off of you when you have less to be responsible for in your journey. It is the difference between running free and running with a yoke over your shoulders. It is not merely the weight of the material in literal form, but the emotional and mental weight of the magnitude given to the value of these items that are causing the sluggish movement. I am not saying to throw everything away and become a transient who lives out of a backpack. However, make sure the great effort you are placing on things here to preserve is not consuming your life in a way that prevents you from giving effort to the preservation of eternal life for yourself and for those with whom you are given responsibility and influence.

This message is a “sermon” for me. I am about to embark upon even greater purging and I pray you partner with me in the need to spread our blessings to others. May today be as freeing for you as it will be for me. Grab a garbage bag and go!

We are all teachers...

So everybody had a favorite teacher in school. You cannot tell me that you spent 12 years in the school system (or longer) and never encountered a teacher that made a difference in your life. Even if it was just one, there is one when I made this very statement sprang to mind. They challenged you. They pushed you. They accepted you. They loved you. They made you feel like you mattered.

I have had SEVERAL teachers make a critical impact on my life. Even if you have amazing parents, you were impacted by teachers in some form or fashion. And teachers, make sure you realize that. Even the good kids are watching and learning more from you than just your knowledge of the Pythagorean Theorem and comma splices. Children, be it 3 or 13 or even 18, are watching a learning. If we are to be honest with ourselves, if we are living a life that is thriving and productive, we are ALL learning until we take our last breath.

But even during college, when I left the career track of licensed counselor to return to the classroom teacher assignment, I was unaware of all that God was doing. I did know that I had some obstacles to overcome in order to be good at what I was assigned to do. That is part of my make-up though. I am not satisfied with just getting by, so I wanted to be well qualified for the job. The other catch was my subject matter was somewhat of a hindrance for the hiring process. I love learning, but I am stronger in one subject field than I am in the others. I LOVE HISTORY. Therefore, it was a no brainer when I chose to pursue secondary education social science for my bachelor’s degree.

How many of you just got it? Did you just connect the dots? I, Jodi Powell, a female, in the state of Alabama, was choosing to teach social studies. Hmmmmm, let me be more stereotypically clear. I was a girl trying to get a job in a “man’s world.” Did you go to school in a small Southern area? I reserve this cliché for just this region as I have not seen it as strong in other regions of the United States. This subject matter in the South was reserved for teachers who could – cough, cough – coach. Not just coach though; coach a boy’s sport. Yep, I was a lady trying to get a job on the frontlines.

So I had to prove myself. I not only had to know my material, I had to make it relevant to my students so that it was not just another class of repetitious memorization. I pray that each of you reading this had a teacher that made the information applicable. Whether you are a mechanic or a brain surgeon, social studies is vital. It carries you into your career as history provides you with awareness of what methods for your work are effective and ineffective. It carries you into your social interaction with colleagues and clients. It carries you into your pocketbook with economic principle and survival.

I can’t help it though. My love for history is beyond nerdy.

I want to know why Adolph Hitler hated the Jews, not simply that he did. I want to know why the United States was sucked into World War I when they professed a desire to remain uninvolved. I want to know why China remained a closed country for so long and has now exploded with power so quickly and how that affects the future of my country, because it does. I want to know how early pioneers combated water shortage or why certain tribes in Africa live so far away from water. I want to know why the exact same crowd that worshiped and celebrated Jesus as he rode into Jerusalem turned on him in less than a week. All of this and more is essential for helping us to understand the state of our world today. The same factors that were present for the cause of many of these situations are the same factors present today. Why? Because the earth is still inhabited by sinful people. Because every part of this earth is still ruled and ruined by humans.
Hitler hated Jews because of his past. Do you know people who judge others or hold a grudge because of their past?

The US was thrown into World War I because they chose to assist and involve themselves in the war secretly long before they were attacked. Do you know people who are masters of deceit and manipulation and live a life portraying their innocence? A lie?

China’s refusal to be an open country for centuries was simply an effort to prevent their empire from being influenced by any outsider that thinks or acts unlike how they desire for their people to think or act. China acted as parents seeking to prevent their children from being thwarted by the world and in so doing created a greater loyalty and stronger power. This strong and ENORMOUS loyalty patiently waited until the bonds of their “family” was tight enough that exposure to the outside world would not alter its unity and therefore allow it to grow into an economic GIANT almost overnight. This strength and unified front is almost too powerful to combat. Do you know people who are strong in their faith and are difficult to sway?

Early pioneers wanted a better life, but with that came hard work including trial and error on discovering water sources – the most critical necessity for survival. Do you know people who are determined and committed?

African tribes operate under territorial dominance and ancestral pride. When their predecessors establish themselves in a region, it is their duty to continue the protection of their tribal name by sustaining the dominance of the region despite the deterioration of the usability of the area. Do you know people who are stuck in a bad situation simply because they are afraid they might hurt someone’s feelings, or because that is the way it has always been done, so they are afraid to try anything new?

The Jews heard of Jesus and his miraculous works and his bold questioning of the authorities and their teaching, so his celebrity status among the rumor mill was rebellious powerhouse. However, when the authorities presented a different rumor about Jesus – one stating he was guilty of self-promotion and blaspheme according to law – they turned on him quicker than toddler bated by candy. Do you know people who are easily swayed by what they hear and the latest and greatest new thing?

It is SOOOOO important that we see that the patterns of our society today are critically aligned with human emotion, knowledge and lack-there-of, ability to survive, and awareness of actions affecting the present and the future. You see, I get paid to explain all of this for a living, but really, you are all explaining it every day to your sphere of influence.

When you choose to eat out every day for lunch, you are either stating that you are willing to budget part of your income for the luxury of subway fixing your sandwich versus yourself because you can financially afford it or because you are too lazy to do your own meal preparation or because you find the fellowship with the people worth the sacrifice in finances or because you have not sat down and realized that $5/day, $25/week, $100/month adds up.

When you choose to harbor ill will towards your parents for their failures in your upbringing, you are creating a cycle as your children with which you have been entrusted are listening, watching, and experiencing your bitterness. They in turn will take that into their families and continue the cycle of abuse, neglect, and bitterness which will then spill over into their social groups as it has with you. This bitterness leads to jealousy in society and jealousy sparks negative feelings and actions that are often acted upon…leading to conflict, leading to harm, leading to destruction of individuals and of entire civilizations.

When you choose to sacrifice and give up personal desires so that someone dear to you can have better provisions or better access or better opportunity, you are modeling for those watching what it is like to be radically committed to the advancement and well-being of someone else. The joy that you silently experience watching your child get that scholarship after the hours you spent reviewing with them for every assessment they had over a 12 year period is not going unnoticed. The jalopy you drove until it had 300k miles on it so that you could afford for your spouse to drive a car that is conducive to their needs is not going unnoticed. The frustration you experience at family gatherings as that one cousin gets on your nerves is rewarded as your children are raised seeing the importance of family.

When you choose to get up and go to work and do your job in such a way that earns recognition and accolades by coworkers and employers, you are modeling for your family, AND also the coworkers and employers the value of hard work and commitment leads to excellence in production and survival of the greater good. You are tired and you are drained, but others are greatly benefited by your endurance.

You are teaching not just your family, but your friends, your coworkers, your fellow citizens, your fellow inhabitants of this earth every day. When you leave this world, what do you want to be remembered about you? Do you want people to remember how bitter and critical and selfish you were? Do you want the world to see you as passive and an enabler of the weak? Do you want your insecurities to beam? Do you want entitlement to be the theme of your generation?

Or do you want to be the person that helps restore and/or sustain your family’s name and heritage? Do you want to be remembered as strong and courageous and selfless? Do you want to be remembered as a leader in your actions and beliefs? Do you want to be remembered as someone who is tolerant and yet unwavering in your conviction? Do you want to be someone who was encouraging and adventurous and respectful? Do you want to be someone who models absence of envy and greed through generosity of money and time? Are you enduring with dignity?

What are you teaching your “class” today? They are ready and waiting to learn. Perhaps today you need to work on your lesson plans. Your time with them is short.

What It Takes to be a Mom

As we concluded the celebration of the mother and move on into the preparation for the close of school, the beginning of summer, and eventually the honoring of the father, I am challenged to reflect upon the attributes that even gave rise to an actual holiday honoring the matriarch. Over the past few decades, we have found a reason to deem every day some sort of holiday or day of recognition for a unique situation or cause or role in society. I mean did you know that today is National Pack Rat Day? And let me scold you as you most likely missed the appropriate solemnness required on May 3rd for Lumpy Rug Day? The visibility of light sabers in my area on May 4 was low and discouraging on Star Wars Day (May the Fourth Be with You)! May seems to also be a month embracing the straying from dietary discipline with May 5 - National Hoagie Day, May 6 - No Diet Day, May 11 - Eat What you Want Day, and May 15 - National Chocolate Chip Day!

The numerous additional holidays are entertaining and fun. They create silly unity across cultural divides. I mean, really, everybody loves chocolate chip cookies (almost)! That is the desired purpose of many of these holidays – to create awareness that we are not all as different as we may seem. Yet, that was the original design of the primary days of celebration before the 5 designated holidays a day exploded. Anna Jarvis is credited with the elevation of a national awareness day for Mom and it became an actual nationally recognized holiday in 1914 (the year WWI was revving up). However, Jarvis would later seek to remove this holiday because of the over-commercialization of the honor. This same thing has happened with Christmas, Easter, Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc. Even birthdays now are insane. As a mom, there is an enormous pressure to compete with every other little kid’s birthday themes and still have money in the bank to buy cereal for the week after. And also as a mother, there is the same pressure to educate my children on the over-commercialization of holidays so they are not disappointed later in life when their birthday might be an extra bowl of ramen and using the free cookie coupon they saved from a college bible study.

And it’s back to mom…did you catch that. There are so many things that are vital to parenting! I completely understand the elevated prescriptions of Prozac, Zoloft, and yes, even Ambien.

Society says…
Make sure you breastfeed because they will need to develop your immunities and yada, yada
Use cloth diapers to protect the environment that will one day be theirs
Stay at home so they have a better preparation for school with your one-on-one time
Put them in a quality childcare facility so that they are prepared for school
Take them on adventures so they are aware of the creation and all there is
Take them to this performance, this party, this camp, this class…
Pay for clothes that will endure the rough and tumble
Make sure to get expensive pictures that will last
Let them explore activities until they find the one that is right for them
In each activity, they can’t just have the bottom of the line apparel, they need the good stuff…otherwise how will they know if this is the right activity for them…
Get them in the right school for academics or athletics or said other extracurricular
Let them be little – so if they don’t like it, let them quit, they are just kids anyway
Respect only those who respect you
Fight for your rights
Accept those who are different

God says…
Teach them chores…responsibility to the greater good and selflessness
Teach them to give, to share, to sacrifice – loving others above themselves and receiving that satisfaction
Model for them strength, dignity, self-respect, and self-discipline so they have an idea of how to carry themselves when you are not there to verbally coach them
Model for them wisdom and discernment so they can make decisions that are beneficial to themselves and to their future when you are not there to coach them
Teach them what true joy and happiness is – and where to draw the line on celebration
Teach them reverence AND respect for all of God’s creation regardless if it appears to be deserving
Honor the Sabbath – there is a day that He asks us to acknowledge reserved for corporate worship. Your magnitude of the extent of that is personal and between you and God, but know that your kids are watching and learning
Honor thy Father and Mother – how you interact with your parents is how they will interact with you if not a little less when they are your age
Take risks – teach them to not be afraid, for He is the Lord our God, what can MAN do to us
Fight for the weak and protect the needy
Do not covet – do they hear you saying that you want what the Jones’ have? They will in turn want what their classmates’ have…
GO – be willing to pick up and leave if he calls you to something greater. The greatest tragedy in today’s society is the lack of obedience to follow after the calling of the Lord. If people would follow, this nation would transform.

We honored moms just recently, and it is questionable as to whether it is too commercialized like every other holiday. If we get down to the root of the role of mom, the tug and pull from all angles of society, than we can’t help but honor her. She must constantly be on the practice of discernment. She must constantly be actively on her guard ready to defend, fight for, and sacrifice for her family and friends. She must be aware of jealousy before it consumes her and takes her to a place dishonoring to God. She must maintain relationships with past and present and future with awareness of the impact that they make on not only her own person, but on her family. She must be bold and embrace the wind with confident strides while maintaining dignity and poise. She must know the father’s voice and listen clearly as it calls to her above the chatter of the world and as He calls, she MUST GO.

Passing Along an Admired Author's Summary of Proverbs 31

I often read the publications from Girlfriends in God and today's post from Mary Southerland was a direct hit for me as a woman in today's busy society. I wanted to share it with you.

http://www.girlfriendsingod.com/2014/how-to-enjoy-your-family-part-2-3/

Go read.

Refinement

The third I will bring into the fire; I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them: I will say, “They are my people,” and they will say, “The Lord is our God.” Zechariah 13:9

We used to sing this praise song in college called Refiner’s Fire. We would sing it with true worship and desire to honor God in our praise. We would speak the words and humbly bow in His presence with awareness of His desire for us to be righteous and pure. We were in college; so our understanding of testing was a difficult professor, a break-up, a challenging class, an absence of sleep from a procrastination session, lack of funds, another bowl of ramen, and maybe a change of major causing an extension to our tenure. Now were there people in college that experienced greater challenges than that? Absolutely. I had classmates lose family members to cancer and tragic car accidents. I had classmates put on probation because of academic and social choices. I had classmates struggle with accepting who God really is and if he really even cared about them and if he was even real…and I went to a Southern Baptist University.

Now fastforward a “few” years, and I realize that my true refinement was only beginning in college. My husband and I met on the campus of Samford University. It’s wonderful! I hope to send my children there, but it will take my death and their inheritance of my life insurance policy to pay for one semester. (BTW, thanks again Mom & Dad for forking out that undeserved assistance). While in college, I probably experienced the typical difficulties –
1. Learning that my high school, though wonderful, was unable to completely prepare me for the challenges of a liberal arts school – I came through that fire alright.
2. Experiencing break ups with the past and realizing I needed to shed my history in order to embrace my future.
3. Being single – when I was at Samford, it was a little like junior high…right down to the Caf where girls sat at one table and boys sat at another table and looked at each other with those bashful eyes. Silliness
4. Losing my patriarchal grandfather, whom I had grown up with next door and had contributed quite a bit to my life. (insert giant grin here as he was simply a hot mess)
5. My first “C”! And being ok with it.
6. Losing an election and coming to terms with the fact that God had something else for me – something better.
7. Having my apartment flood with sewage (yep, that was awesome – WARNING – DO NOT LIVE UNDERNEATH THE CAT LADY)
8. Changing majors and realizing my calling was in need of refocusing
9. Growing in my faith – and finding friends who would actually push me to be more like Christ

Then life really happened. Some say that Jeremy and I live a life that borders on the edge of a good Job story. In fact, when I first started blogging, the name of my blog was “What the Crap?” I found myself saying that A LOT in our past few years of marriage as things have hit us upside the head over and over again. In fact, after we established friends in Texas, we began to discourage their friendship and send them away for fear that our lives would rub off on their lives.

Since being married I (we) have experienced:
1. Challenging conversations with friends that cost us loss of friendships for a temporary time
2. Struggles with funding as we made combined $14,000 our first year of marriage COMBINED
3. Car struggles – like the still confusing collision with a GIANT bale of hay (not my doings), brakes falling out of a car while driving down a busy city road, air conditioner going out, backing into people in a parking lot (twice), hydroplaning in the snow, tickets for missing stickers, etc.
4. Traveling across the country only to learn that the apartment complex of which you are moving to has you moving a week later and won’t have your apartment ready as you sit in their parking lot with a UHAUL. Yes, my inner beast emerged and we got our apartment.
5. 9/11
6. Working jobs other than education…yes, refining fire
7. Having my car broken into and all they stole was my battery!
8. Having my purse stolen and therefore, my identity stolen (that haunts you for years)
9. Learning Texas history to teach and not being a native Texan
10. Having our home vandalized in the middle of the night
11. Walking with friends through pregnancy woes
12. Graduate school for both of us
13. Infestation of ants in my dishwasher and scorpions in my basement
14. Kidney stones (twice)
15. Losing my mom – the rock of my family
16. Nearly losing my husband - he has cheated death many times, but one time was more terrifying than the others – 108 fever
17. House flooding (twice)
18. Divorce in our family
19. Adjustment to new families
20. Moving now 8 times
21. Car & house shopping (it is a refinement process for sure)
22. Challenges in the employment of the church world
23. Challenges in the employment of public education
24. Grown Up Mean Girls
25. A child with night terrors – which we believe were more than that…
26. Losing a child before meeting her
27. Watching my child lose a friend
28. Hospitalization of my children
29. Depression
30. Going when other’s say why?

There is something that I began in college through the mentoring of great women of faith and through the challenge of great professors. I began to process this concept in High School, but got better at it in college. LISTENING. Sometimes I do poorly at it still, but I feel God speak and literally hear God speak more now than ever. This did not happen because I was lucky enough to be born to a Hannah. This did not happen because I am in the lineage of greatness like Mary. It happened because of my refinement. There are many stages of my life where I found myself struggling with what was going on. There are many stages in my life where I cried out to God and asked him what I had done to deserve this struggle?

Yet, I can tell you on the backside of every storm, I see the rainbow. And I have learned that during the storm, I will hurt, but my hurt can be comforted in the palm of His hand. I have learned that I am allowed struggles in order to boast of Christ. I have learned that in order to become a better person, the refining fire must be “hot” not warm. I have learned that if I am going to improve, there will be more fires to come. I have learned that in order to be one with the Lord, refinement is necessary. I have learned that I am constantly a work-in-progress and I must be OK with that. Perfection is not achieved, but I must live as if it is achievable.

Why Are You Still Sitting There?

After I became aware that God had bigger things in store for me than just my quaint little white picked dream, I felt him open my eyes to places where I could be of service. Now this is a catch 22 with me. I see needs far more often than most and sometimes find myself in a tizzy trying to make sure these needs are met. I went through a time in my life where I thought if I see it, than God revealed it to me, than I am the one to fulfill that need. So as you can gather, I ran on little sleep and constant stress.

Have I improved from that status? A little. However, most people will tell you that I still tend to spread myself too thin. Though I can list for you the things that I am not doing that other people my age or my place in life are doing that give me great anxiety. So God and I talk about this A BUNCH! You see, once I realized that God had called me into His specific services, I did not know quite which venue this would be. So I started dabbling in everything so that I could gather what my strengths were and figure out where my place was.

I have helped in children and in youth and in media and in missions at each church God has placed me. All have been fulfilling and rewarding. All have been building me for another step later on in the journey. The people that I worked with and for during these appointments were also some of the greater sources of influence along my way. I will never forget one time when I orchestrated a non-profit sports camp for kids with the help of many great friends and community supporters including one of the greatest principals to ever live. He believed in me and encouraged me and helped me make things happen. There are many that crossed his path that will tell you the same thing. Having people in your life like this even beyond the support of parents is crucial in allowing you to have wind under your wings and not be idly standing on the sideline.

However parents matter and my parents were supportive and encouraging as well. Of their two children, I was the more boisterous, gregarious and borderline obnoxious one. My brother did not drive them near as crazy as I did with insane ideas and busy plans. Yet, they loved me and urged me to try. That’s impacting to my future. There are things that they did to give me courage and bravery that they will never know. I had many, many , many restrictions as a child and teenager. Yet, when it came to something that would help me grow, all signs were ago. Thanks Mom and Dad! I guess this is also why I have a hard time with people who are content in their lives who have similar home situations. If you are one of those who are blessed with supportive and encouraging parents, why are you still sitting there? They were not given to you to coddle you all of your days. They are there to give you a break when the bell rings and you need water and a break from the fight.

If you have been given even that one someone in your life who is of encouragement or support; who believes in you and makes that ever impacting eye contact where you know they think you are capable; who speaks wisdom to you and gives your mind space to stretch, why are you still sitting there? GOD GAVE THEM TO YOU SO YOU WILL GO! God gave you someone to push you so you would find your strengths and find your gifts. And then He wants you to take what you find and USE IT TO GLORIFY HIM, not to sit there and go “look at me! I’m pretty awesome, so I will sit right here and enjoy the awesomeness that people tell me I possess and not share it with anyone who might need it.” God had people pour into you, so you will turn around and pour into others. Don’t be selfish!

Sometimes your pouring is not just your offspring. In fact, always it is not. There are others needing you and your gifts and your strengths. AND your offspring need to see that humility and willingness to go. Before I continue with my life story, I want to thank all of those people who have invested in me and have open my eyes to the world before me and the great need to go. God did not equip me to stay idle. Nor did He you. Is He able to call people to serve at home? Sure. But there are too many local missionaries and too few outside of their comfort zone. Why are you still sitting there?

Oh What Is Man?

In choirs past we have had the opportunity to sing songs that are both lyrically and instrumentally moving. Some songs bring excitement and adoration of the King through clapping and shouting and giant smiles across each face. And some songs create a mood of somberness and humility before the Almighty Creator. One such song we sang in BSU Choir was Majesty and Glory of Your Name. I know that many of you have probably sang this in a choir yourself at some point. It has become a staple choice of many choir directors for such the reason mentioned above. It brings about the emotion of fear and reverence of our Lord.

Last night, our skies were darkened by more than the absence of light. Our skies were darkened by massive clouds full of energy and power. Our skies were darkened by the colliding of wind and temperature. Our skies were darkened by gushing water pouring from these clouds. Our skies were darkened and yet illuminated by the lightening as it blazed across the span of our outside ceiling and touched the earth with vigor and swiftness. Our skies were darkened by the dominance of the turbulent and massive tornadoes that destroyed so many things within seconds. Our skies were darkened by the power of God to give and take away.

My family was blessed…even more so than the last time these steamrolled through our state one April day just a few years back. This time we have maintained power and we had a basement to go into for shelter. I feel spoiled and unworthy as I know that even as I write this, I have friends and family picking up pieces of their history and of their present life that are no longer whole. The great question “why?” will be prominent today and I feel enormous pressure to answer that question. Yet, there is a time and a place. I am a firm believer that each person is built not only physically different, but also mentally and emotionally. Comfort is needed right now – yes, but words are not the comfort that will best show Jesus. Giving feet to His word is needed today. Serving and exerting the energy that He has given you to attend to the people that He has created and to love the families He adores is the only answer you can give today.

My God will supply all of my needs. Yes, this is true and yes, it is comforting. Yet, it is difficult to explain in moments like this why he would spare one and allow another harm. I am a prime example of God sparing AND allowing harm. I am also aware that it is not of me to find myself unworthy of pain. God spared me from the greatest pain with the crucifixion of His ONE and ONLY son. God desires to speak to us all and sometimes He must speak through others in order to get our attention. Sometimes you are that “other” being used by the Almighty to shake someone into a realization that He is who He says He is and He can do what He says He can do and He will do what He says He will do. So many people that I cross paths with in this region of the world are professing Christians, but their lives leave NO evidence of a walk with the Lord. He longs for ALL of us to come to an intimate relationship with Him, and yet we keep putting it off until tomorrow because there is too much to do today.

What is there to do when it is all gone? What is there to accomplish when you have nothing? Where is there to go when you are surrounded by destruction? What is it that you just have to have that you will sacrifice one more moment at His feet in order to be of this world? Who can you cry out to in the darkness when the wind is roaring so loudly that you cannot even hear your own voice? He will spare no expense to get your attention. There has not been a tornado pass through a community in my lifetime that did not destroy one or more churches – GOD’S OWN HOUSE. Wrap your brain around that! He allowed the destruction of a shelter of WORSHIP OF HIM so that He could demonstrate to you His power and might.

Again I looked and saw all the oppression that was taking place under the sun: I saw the tears of the oppressed – and they had no comforter; power was on the side of the oppressors – and they have no comforter…And I saw that all labor and all achievement spring from man’s envy of his neighbor. This too is MEANINGLESS, a chasing after the wind…There is no end to his toil, yet his eyes were not content with his wealth. “For whom am I toiling,” he asked, “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment.”…Better a poor but wise youth than an old but foolish king who no longer knows how to take warning. Ecclesiastes 4:1,4,8,&13

Don’t misunderstand me friends, this passage is not saying that your home lies in ruins because you were envious. It could be. But it could also be saying to your neighbor or someone within your sphere of influence that their energy is being exerted on things that are temporary and not eternal. Exhausting yourself to gain worldly fame, wealth and prestige does not gain you eternity. You are depriving yourself of the joy of what life was truly intended to be. For in a moment it is gone. The oppressed are in need of a comforter and healer. Yet those responsible for the oppression are also in need of healing as a wound or the weight of sin has caused them to behave in such a way.

The sun is rising, but the sky is still gray and full of clouds. More storms are coming. Are you ready? Do you have your eternity secured and your priorities in order? Our world is diseased and God is patiently waiting for our choice to be Him and not self. May He be ever merciful today as we watch His power unravel once more. Oh what is man that you are mindful of him?

The Majesty and Glory of Your Name

When I gaze
Into the night sky
And see the work
Of Your fingers
The moon and stars
Suspended in space
But what is man
That You are mindful of him?
You have given man
A crown of glory and honor
And have made him
A little lower than the angels
You have put him
In charge of all creation
The beasts of the field
The birds of the air
The fish of the sea
But what is man
Oh, what is man
That You are mindful of him?

O Lord, our God
The majesty and glory
Of Your name
Transcends the earth
And fills the heavens
O Lord, our God
Little children praise Him perfectly
And so would we
And so would we
Alleluia, Alleluia
The majesty and glory of Your name
Alleluia, Alleluia

Follow

The little missionary girl continues…

She was aware that God was calling her to follow Him, but as to whether it was the far East as she secretly fell in love with Hong Kong or if it was to just the eastern parts of the United States…that was up in the air. As I grew in my development through the wonderful era of middle school and high school, I struggled with the typical identity crisis that all adolescence battled. Though I was a believer and possessed within me this still small voice that whispered wisdom and caution, I still wanted to fit in to the mainstream. And I know that God has made me and created within me the drive and ambition that exists, there is always going to be that fine line of what is my desire and what is His desire. From time to time, I decided that my desire was His…when it wasn’t. I made decisions about places that I chose to give my time and attention to that were most likely not the best use of my energy and my image.

Does that make sense? I know that God grants us freedoms and I was aware of the surface understanding of that freedom as a teenager. Yet, my heart was still so immature and unable to truly practice this freedom in a way that was truly honoring and glorifying to the One who granted such freedoms. Though I was free in Christ, I am not free to cause others to stay distant from Christ. So there is an unfortunate selfishness that comes with the exercising of freedoms bringing those who are in the celebration of freedom with you in a place of decision. Is the God with whom she (Jodi) professes to worship the same God that I have heard of throughout sporadic mentioning within my child-rearing? Well if it is, and she is participating in the same extracurricular activities as me, than I am good, right? Wrong! Yet, my life did not give them pause.

I was the “everybody’s friend” kid in school. I don’t think that I was truly aligned with the in crowd nor do I think I was too terribly aligned with any clique more strongly than another. I did have a core group of friends who were also believers and who were also loveable by many. Frankly, I think this was a benefit as I began to wrestle through the hypocrisy I found myself in. As I realized that my decisions affected more than just me, I also realized that the connections that I had made in all of my socializing proved to give me a heart for the struggle of the teen. My heart learned to listen and not just judge – as it once did. My heart began to process the pain and struggle of friends and schoolmates as I started to understand why they made some of the decisions that they made. My mind was able to formulate the rationale behind the choices and direction of life and in so doing, I was also approachable. My approachability allowed me to be able to listen when others would not and my approachability would also, from time to time, allow for God to speak through me as He wanted to reach out to these fellow students who were in need of hearing that they mattered and their decisions were forgivable and that their future was salvageable.

God is good. So this leads me to the whole college entrance with a major in psychology. I would save the world through counseling and most likely end up in some form of youth ministry. I get it. God was building me to lead Disciple Now weekends and to write Bible study curriculum…sorta. God was giving me an understanding of childhood and adolescence so that my ability to serve in the schools was a ministry and not just an employment. God was giving me a heart for the unheard. God was calling me into ministry not only in my occupation, but in my life over all.

In March of 2000, I was 3 months into an engagement with this guy who was in medical school. What he didn’t know and still questions is that I was planning to marry my soul mate – the person whom God had paired me with in order to do work for His kingdom. Therefore, his occupation did not matter to me. If he was a doctor of medicine, than I envisioned us taking medical missionary trips together in the future. If he was a carpenter, than we would build playground equipment and habitat homes in the future together. I didn’t care. But he did. In March of 2000, my fiancé called me one Wednesday evening to tell me that he had heard from the Lord. I love these moments. I don’t know life without them. God speaks and we listen and it is that simple. Goosebumps, right? Well, the Lord had clearly told him to remove himself from medical school and pursue a career in the ministry. My fiancé feared that I would leave him because apparently I had appeared to be a gold digger. 

But remember the little missionary girl? Well, she came alive that night and wept with joy that once again, all the pieced began to take place. Jodi, you will love the ones who need the love the most and you will listen to them all. Jodi, you will adapt your life in order to reach the unreachable. Jodi, you will serve my kingdom through the schools so that you can help impact more families for my kingdom. Jodi, you will have the personality needed to compliment a minister. Jodi, you will use your event planning and leadership to help your spouse creatively lead a flock. Jodi, you will utilize your faith in prayer to get you through some challenging times (oh and what I didn’t know then…). Jodi, you will have supportive family members who will walk with you through this new adventure. Jodi, your spouse will make big decisions and brave decisions and will need you to be his cheerleader through and through. Jodi, your physical strength will be challenged and you will need to maintain it for my glory. Jodi, your trust in my provisions will be challenged, and I will show up.

I shared my whirlwind of affirmation with my fiancé over the phone that night and allowed him to know that I was behind him 100%. For I also trusted that his knowledge of science and medicine would be a part of our ministry in the years to come. I knew that this season had purpose and as I reflected upon where we were and the previous seasons coming to clarity, I believed that my Savior would make it all clear once more in His time. So I follow…

Timing is everything and timing is perfect when it is of the Lord.

Go

Pray...Pack...Go

We urge our missionaries to do this. We tell our seniors in our youth group to do this. We hope our military does this. Do we?

Wednesday nights are designated for missions emphasis in the Southern Baptist world. As a young girl, I was exposed regularly to heroes of faith. Each week we were taught about different missionaries and their callings to certain people groups across the globe. Each week we were challenged to pray for these people with great awareness of what they had sacrificed. Each week we were educated about the vast differences in our simple and yet posh culture and the minimalist and sometimes primitive culture of the targeted region.

Shhh, don't tell anybody, but I was the geeky kid even back then spinning the globe and trying to soak in all of the great differences in all of His creation both on a physical geographic standpoint and a political geographic standpoint. I LOVE SOCIAL STUDIES. There I said it. Yet, even greater than that, I am fascinated by history. I want to know how we got off of an ark and repopulated the earth not constantly looking over our shoulder at that big boat on the mountain and almost kinda shivering in our skin with the awareness that the same God that put that boat afloat and the ground my feet rest upon once under water is the same God I am daily in the presence of. What happened? Which generation dropped the ball? Which dispersement of children or grandchildren stopped placing emphasis on worship of the Creator of the world...the one who allowed them dry land again?

Nevertheless, it happened and the distance between reverential trust and healthy fear of God and the daily walk we trudge is greater than it has ever been. As a young girl, I knew that God was calling me to go and serve him, but that was my church thinking. As I was growing in my school (my career prep area), I was toying with all the different jobs I could do that would give me fulfillment. But let me tell you something super cool. God was at work when I was a child too. I remember very clearly as a second grader deciding that I wanted to be a teacher. I think all little girls sometimes toy with that career, but I was passionate about it. That remained my goal for the majority of my elementary days. Upon junior high, as classes started getting harder, I also fell in love with the idea of helping people through medicine. So I decided I wanted to be a doctor. This employment is also noteworthy, buth the two are different in many ways...yet similar too.

Well, Chemistry happened. My love of medicine turned to fear of medical school and I backed down. Now how can I help people. Psychology. A new class at my high school, but oh how I fell in love with the study of the human mind and how we actually work so differently. So this was my major upon entering undergrad. God, knew better. Even during my first semester of my freshman year at Samford, God was redirecting me. I was able to join a ministry that spent one night a week ministering to the youth in our juvenille detention center in the local city. It was there that I reignited my passion to teach. It was there that a fellow leader in this ministry gently reminded me of this gift. So I changed majors and returned to my second grade passion. It was not just a career change though. My calling had come full circle.

Through the weekly visits to the juvenille detention center, I was reminded that God gave me the passion to go. No, He commanded me to go. The previous 10 years of my life was my preparation for the path that he had lying before me. I loved medicine for many reasons. I didn't just love the study of the human body - though it is truly fascinating - I loved the idea of helping people find their strength and purpose and hope. I didn't just love the study of the human mind - though it is far more detailed than we can fathom - I loved the idea of helping people work through their problems and find a healty resolution and plan of attack for the challenges that will still come their way.

Through teaching, I not only explain the government, but I also help students find out who they are in our society. I counsel them to have ambition and to make our world better by being the best that they were destined to be. I listen when their home life does not promote their best interest. I love them when others do not. I explain to them things that they have never had truly explained in a fair and just way. I hold them accountable and let them know I believe they are capable when the world does not. So I use counseling in the classroom - A LOT.

My passion for medicine was met in a rather unique way. My soul mate that God aligned me with is a unusual medical case that is not as simple as some medical conditions. My prior knowledge of biology and human anatomy have been awakened in great ways as I have become an uncertified nurse on more than one occasion to my husband. God was so kind to allow me the attention to these subjects and the joy of this knowledge for it TRULY DID benefit me in my years to come.

Now back to the little missionary girl. She is now all grown up. God has equipped her to teach and to understand his creation both inside each human mind and body and inside each culture. He didn't just do that because learning is fun, though it is. God did that because he wanted her to be prepared for what lies ahead. You see, today I will begin to tell you the story of how our family is answering the call to go. Today, even to me. The past ** years of my life are now all beginning to make sense. What has God prepared you to do? What has He given you a passion for? What has He peaked your interest about? Have you ever sat down and began to connect the pieces?

Our family is going. I want to tell you why...

Friendship

So I have a confession to make. I am a horrible friend. I am. The people that call me friend probably do so out of pity. And no, I am not writing this to fish. I am exposing some of the ugly truths in my life that I need to own up to. I rarely let people into my deep dark world. I struggle to overly commit myself to the investment of a friendship. I take conflict as a sign we might not mesh. I struggle with coming out of the comforts of my jammies and my faux rabbit fur blanket to go play.

Many people boast on having large amounts of friends. Yet, I think they are most likely taking inventory of their fond acquaintances. Fond acquaintances are people you would grab a bite to eat with on a scheduled Friday night. They are the ones you sit with at lunch and commiserate about the drudgery of working for the man. They are the ones whom you borrow change for that needed soda at the 2:00pm napping hour we all endure. They are the ones who remember your birthday and maybe bring cookies. They are the ones who give you advice about buying a car or a house or which doctor to use.

Friends? Ah, friends are different. Because of this distinguishing status, they tend to be fewer in quantity. Friends are people you call after a horrible day and they drop everything and go to Sonic for a Route 44 root beer float AND drink one with you despite their commitment to a diet so that you do not drink alone. Friends are the ones who send you random texts throughout the day to make you laugh and to distract you from the drudgery of work. Friends are the ones who bring you Starbucks at 2:00pm with a note that simply says recharge OR that loans you the money for the soda never expecting the repayment because they know it can come in greater returns than $1.25. Friends decorate your car or office for your birthday and kidnap you for birthday dinner at your favorite greasy dive.

A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24

Wealth brings many new friends, but a poor man is deserted by his friend...Many seek the favor of a generous man, and everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts. Proverbs 19:4 & 6

Your friends are the ones still standing in the wings waiting to hug you when you announce that you are no longer able to serve as a leader in the local community service venue you have given 10 good years of your life. Your friends are the one that don't tell you what other people are saying because they have already defended you to them and the issue is no longer necessary to address. Your friends are the one who don't ask for continuous favors, but instead are about trying to out give you. In the above passages of Proverbs, there is mention of the attraction of wealth tends to have the attraction of "friends." When the popularity wears off or the newness wears off or the money runs out, many will find a new host in which to leach upon. However, there is the one. Sometimes the one is not whom you thought it would be nor is it when you thought you would find them.

Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy...Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. Proverbs 27:6 & 9

Some of my closest friends are those with whom I have had some of the most difficult conflict. Their love for me and willingness to call me out on my sin and shame is PAINFUL...but necessary. We need that person in our life that is able to discern when we are stepping out of line and when we are not honoring the Lord. We need that person in our life to speak truth to us when we are creating our own. We need that person in our life to listen to our sorrow and to allow us to mourn while helping us recover. We need that person that will give us the swift kick in the pants when it is time to get over ourselves and stop being selfish.

Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel. Do not forsake your friend and your father's friend, and do not go to your brother's house in the day of your calamity. Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother who is far away. Proverbs 27:9 & 10

Fond acquaintances will not do that. Fond acquaintances will pat us on the shoulder when we are lamenting over the same struggle for the 100th time and verbalize how difficult our lives are feeding the sorrow. Then after patting us on the shoulder, they will get in the car and drive away calling their other friend and telling them how pitiful we are. My husband always says that when you find yourself in consistent tragedy over and over again, there is the obvious one common denominator in each situation - YOU! A fond acquaintance will not point that out...they might not see it. It isn't because they don't care for you...they just don't KNOW you. Therefore, they can sometimes counsel you to make choices that are not best for you or better yet, not honoring of God.

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. Proverbs 17:17

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

With whom in your life right now do you need to pursue a deeper friendship? Who is capable of helping you sharpen your life into a more effective and enjoyable soul? You just had someone pop in your head didn't you? Now pray about it. Pray that God will solidify your pulling. Pray that God chose this friend and NOT YOU. Pray that God will provide opportunities to develop trust. Pray that God will help you to chisel the wall down that you are hiding behind. Adversity is avoided for fear of inflicting wounds or receiving wounds. Perhaps that is why I am such a crappy friend. I live in this world of avoidance of adversity. Oh but don't you worry, it finds me anyway. Ha!

If God has called you to befriend someone or develop a friendship with them, than pursue it. Pursue it as He pursues you. When they seem to be closed up and reserved and surfacy, just keep exposing yourself so that they realize you are placing a great deal of trust in them. They, too, will eventually start testing the waters. I am not saying to go up to the person in the next cubicle and give them your life story. Just realize that God is going to grant you the desires of your heart - the ones that you suppress. Take God's flashing neon sign. You will be blessed by that person and your world will be better.

Coming Soon

Check back after NOON today! I got one coming! Friendship. Who has mastered that?

Blessed? Now what?

My cup runneth over!

I am too blessed to be stressed!

God is good…all the time!

And on and on go the wonderful colloquialisms of our time about the goodness of God and His rich blessings that He bestows upon us. Yes there are times in our lives that we feel distant from the Lord and are not enthralled with His lavished gifts. However, when we are in that moment of awareness of “life is good,” are we behaving in a way that is respectful of the concept that “life is good”? Complacency v. appreciation is the battle.

You are blessed! Good for you! God has given you…
…a raise
…a new job
…a spouse
…a child
…a new home
…a new car
…a new friend
…safety through travel
…safety through a life situation
…healing

You fill in the blessing. Let me remind you that you are not blessed with just one thing. More on that in a minute. So you are blessed…now what? Are you acting according to that blessing? Are you using that blessing to bless others? Are you taking time to be at the feet of Jesus each and every day and say thank you for this undeserved gift? If you are shaking your head with the answer of no because the things you are blessed with are just everyday life circumstances, let me remind you that your everyday is not the next person’s every day. In My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers elaborates on the order of a prayer life. A prayer life begins by expressing your gratitude to your Creator for all the ways in which He has been faithful to you. Do you do that?

I am not just talking about thanking God for your meals, or even for your good day. Do you thank God that you are where you are at your certain walk? Do you thank God for the challenges that He is walking you through? Do you thank God that you are not where you were yesterday? Do you thank God that you were born where you were? Do you thank God that you have money to put gas in your car to get you to the job that you have so you can receive the paycheck that you get in order to pay the rent that you owe for the home that you have that protects you from the cold outside? Some people feel that thanking God for everything can be a bit excessive and time consuming. Let me tell you, I even wept and praised God after we did our taxes the other day as it was not as bad as I had expected. Some might say I have low expectations…I am just aware that it could always be worse!

It is when you begin to thank Him for things that you begin to realize that life is not that bad. It is when you begin to thank Him for things that your soul begins to release the fear and frustration from what is absent from your life. It is when you begin to thank Him for things that you begin to find direction and with that direction comes a sense of peace and purpose. So you are blessed…now what?

What are you doing with that blessing? Do you have a new car? Awesome. Whom are you allowing the opportunity to share in your blessing? Meaning, who are you taking to school/work/church/grocery store with this new mode of transportation? Do you have a roof over your head? Outstanding! Whom are you allowing to share in this blessing? Do you host Bible studies at your home? Do you allow your kids to have guests over and then model for them how a Christian home functions? Do you allow friends to crash there when they need a place to stay? Do you have a job? Great. Do the people at that job know your great secret – JESUS SAVES? Do they see a difference in you because you have been changed? Do the people not at your work see a difference in you because you have been changed? In other words, are you complaining that you are not among the unemployed?

God has blessed me soooooo many times and pretty much all of these blessings are moments that I am truly undeserving of His hand of mercy. Let me tell you how I keep it in perspective. Now mind you, I do have my toddler pity party every once in a while when I think things are unfair. However, when I am continually throwing that pity party at His feet and not in a large public arena, He is faithful to eventually wipe the tears away and push back my hair so that I can see WHY!

I am blessed to have been born in a country where God is still allowed. I pray that sustains! I am blessed to be born in the South where being a Christian is culture. I am blessed to be born to parents who not only know who Jesus is, but also actually practice regular respectful worship and recognition of His greatness. I am blessed to have an education. I am blessed to have a higher education that assisted me in getting a job. I am blessed to have a job, and have had one everywhere we have lived. I am blessed to be able to pay my bills. I am blessed to be able to travel from time to time to vacation or to visit family. I am blessed to not only have one car that runs, but two. I am blessed to have a spouse that knows the Lord. I am blessed to have a spouse that not only knows the Lord, but chooses to serve in an occupation that allows him the blessing of introducing others to the greatness of our Lord. I am blessed to not only have one, but two healthy and wonderful daughters. I am blessed that they are good kids for the most part. I am blessed to have a good relationship with them. I am blessed to have a good relationship with my brother. I am blessed to have a wonderful sister-in-law. I am blessed to have a beautiful niece and nephew with whom I get to spend time. I am blessed to have tremendous in-laws, not just a father and mother-in-law, but the extended family as well. I am blessed to be able to enjoy family gathers, truly enjoy as both sides of our family are just beautiful. I am blessed to have a pillow to sleep on. I am blessed to have a phone to talk/text/email/etc on. I am blessed to have clothes in my closet. I am blessed to have food in my pantry.

I will stop here as I am sure that most of you are bored with this already. My point is that none of these items I have mentioned in my thankfulness are deserved. And none of these items I am blessed with are universal. As I look around the globe…no, my community, I am keenly aware that everything I am blessed with is missing from someone else that I have come in contact with at some point. So what am I doing with my blessings? That is my earnest prayer today. Lord, you have blessed me with ________. How can I better use it for your kingdom? How can I share it with others? How can I honor you with it? So I am blessed, Father. Now what? What can I do with this gift?

Honesty...

...in a fallen world, is painful.

But God, They Don't...Part 2

In the previous post, we dove into the challenges of dealing with parents that may or may not have been present in your life and may or may not have provided you with a clear path to the Lord. It is crucial that before we go any further, we must first address the very necessary principle of who is in control. Whether you are the parent or the child, though you utilize all the influence that you can muster, you cannot change another person. Just like you, each individual comes to a place where they must make decisions for themselves. You can probably all identify people that belong to amazing families and are still not the most stable citizen. If you wish to change someone and "improve" them, you will only exhaust yourself attempting to influence and alter someone else.

Now, kiddos...as an aspiring parent, I will not even begin to tell you that I am an expert on how to raise your children. My girls are amazing, but I truly believe that is Divine Intervention. AND they have not hit puberty yet. Insert panic face here. However, as an educator and a counselor, I have seen patterns in parenting that are somewhat effective in preserving a parent/child relationship where the child tends to have a desire to respect their parent and makes decisions based upon what they have seen modeled for them. Ere go again, I am the parent of pastor's kids, so again, insert panic face.

So you are an amazing parent. You make sure your child is never hungry and make it to school consistently. You provide them a bed, probably with great bedding that keeps them warm in the winter. You might even let them experience socialization in an extracurricular activity where they can learn teamwork and compromise. You might help them buy that first car, or second, or third. You help them with college and encourage them to reach for the stars. And then you find yourself flabbergasted when they choose to pack up, quit school, move in with a new boyfriend - in Albuquerque - and let you know that they will call and text often. What the crap? You have invested 18+ years of your life trying to help them become successful and yet they "fly the coop," so to say. Why? Or better yet, why God?

As we addressed in the previous post and the first paragraph, you must first begin by ceasing the punishment for not doing enough or doing too much. There is not progress in looking back. You must look forward. The Prodigal Son is the greatest example of a parent who invests and provides and almost spoils their child, only to have that child exert greed and take away some of their laborious reward so that they can then waste it in a fraction of the time it took this father to acquire said wealth. Wow, what a kick in the teeth.

The Bible chooses not to speak on the activity of the father while the son was out partying and then suffering the consequences. It only describes the parent upon the return of the child. Does the father spend his time worrying about the wayward child? We don't know. Does the father spend his time speaking hateful words about his greedy son? We don't know. Does the father sit down and speak with the other brother in order to proceed with life? This is not truly discussed. However, I am sure that many of you have made some guesses as to how his heart was feeling upon this detachment.

Many of us are worrywarts. We want to still be with them when it comes time to make difficult decisions so that we can advise them and direct them. There comes a point when you must just accept that all the effort that you have poured into them to model decision making and to model life direction is all that you can do. Now it is time for them to make these decisions on their own. They must choose to either utilize what they have experienced in your care or they can choose otherwise. Hard, isn't it? Have you also reached the point where the decision they make is not necessarily a bad decision, but it is against your personal preference? You, as a parent, have been given a charge in scripture to train up a child in the way they should go...and then let them go.

I get tense thinking about it. Have you met my youngest? :)

You are in a place of influence in the world (everywhere, not just with your kiddos). So your hope must come in the confidence that you have obeyed the Father's command to you as a parent, and now, it is time to let go. Now, were you perfect? Probably not, as there was only one that walked this earth as perfect. Did you point them to the Lord? Did you share God's word with them other than at Sunday School? Did they see you experiencing a loving and trusting relationship with the Lord? Did they learn to love others by watching you? Did they learn that disappointment is inevitable? Did they learn that practice makes "better"? Did they learn how to think for themselves?

If your answer is NO to any of those questions, than don't freak out. It is not what we did in the past, but where we go from here. If you still have children under your wings, than you are still able to live a God-fearing and God-honoring life for them to witness. Now the charge is upon you. If your children are no longer under your roof, you still have a chance. Though they are adults now and making their own decisions, they are still observing you. Making an effort to grow closer to the Lord, and then sharing about that life-changing experience with your child is noted and stored away in their heart. They will see the person you are and they will see how that person is in comparison to their life. Do not berate yourself for the past. God is not honored in that. Humbly apologizing for not being an example is not a bad thing. Humility is honorable. Graveling is not.

Your children will make decisions without you. Some will give you peace and joy and some will make you hold your breath in anxiety. They are God’s children too and He is waiting on you to let Him help you. Give them to him in your prayers and let Him guide you in parenting. When your gut says discipline or intervene, it is probably the Lord. Know the difference in your desires and His though. Know that sometimes they need to scrape their knee in order to not perform that stunt again. It is hard, but it is worth it.

But God, They Don't...

Honor Thy Father and Mother. Exodus 20:12

Children's children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children. Proverbs 17:6

Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right...that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:1-4

As a child immersed in the church culture since the womb (literally, my mom was a pianist, so I was there 3 times a week), it has been beaten into me to adhere to the 10 commandments. And of course, as a child, the primary one that is preached to little tikes in traditional church settings is "Honor thy Father and Mother. - Exodus 20:12." Yes, the other 9 matter, but parents take great advantage of those moments when outside forces reinforce their authority. I know, as I am now a parent myself.

Let's take this into a perspective that is apart from the traditional setting though. What exactly does the word honor mean? According to Merriam Webster, it means respect that is given to one who is admired. Well, that seems simple enough, right? As a parent, it is implied that because I bore you in my womb and attempted to provide you nourishment for a certain amount of years, and provided shelter and transportation on occasion, than I am to be respected and held in admiration. I am entitled to this glorified place in your life. I am to be feared. I am to be idolized. I am to be duplicated. I am to be the primary authority in all things considered. I am the final say. I brought you in this world and I can take you out - Sir Cosby.

Now how's that make you feel? I would hope that you read that with a slight discomfort and an awareness of how selfish and arrogant that could be perceived. Yet, I see it every day. You see, the Bible is God's word, living and breathing through all who are able to read it and understand it. So, I was raised in an environment where I was to respect the authority of my parents and they had the final say on almost everything until I was no longer on their payroll. However, I was also raised observing the environment of others who were under different authorities. I watched friends and classmates receive abuse from their parents - verbal, mental, and physical. I watched friends grapple with missing parents as they were abandoned at some point along the way. I watched friends who had absentee parents simply because the parent worked another shift and was unable to be available for parenting. So I watched this verse challenge people and I struggled with how to explain it to them. It is easier to explain the grace of God's salvation than to explain the "why's" of life's struggles.

Honor your parents. How do you do that when you do not see them with admiration? Your mom is an alcoholic. Your dad cheats on your mom and everyone knows it. Your mom still acts like she is 17 and tries to be your friend and not your parent. Your dad left 10 years ago and you don't even know where he is. And on and on and on. For unfortunately, we live in a world plagued with sin and selfishness. So as it was in the Bible, it is today. Children suffer for the decisions of their parents. I got lucky. My parents were assertive and involved in my life with great authority, but I respected them and was aware that I was blessed. Sometimes I acted like a brat - ok, probably a lot - but at the end of the day, I knew there were other situations in which I could be raised that would make this simple command extremely difficult to adhere.

Honor is also defined as a symbol of distinction. Your parent is your parent. Period. AS they make decisions that cause you to be unhappy or distraught, they are still your parent. You can respect their place as a symbol of distinction in your world as the person that God placed in your life to bear that title. You can also respect them as the person that God placed in your life to distinctly direct you to an awareness of Him as your Heavenly Father who will never forsake you. You do not have to dedicate your life to the idolizing, glorifying, and duplicating of your parent. Your life is to be spent idolizing, glorifying, and duplicating God.

But God, they don't care for me, help me, take care of me, protect me, love me! He knows. He longs for them to come back to Him or to find Him at all. He longs for them to raise you in a place of great reverence of Him. Until He is able to get through to them, He will continue to bring you into a place where you understand love, grace, mercy, peace, and yes, even forgiveness. He does not command us to place them on a pedestal. He does not command us to idolize them. He does not command us to duplicate them. He does not command us to bail them out of every problem. He does not command us to save them. We cannot save anyone. Only God can. He does command us to honor them. They are your parent. Period. They are also a child of God. Period. Your acknowledgement of that distinction in your life is the beginning of a restoration. It is not complete and utter healing, but a beginning. When honor is given to someone who is undeserving, it is possible that humility can follow. Be the crown of the aged and the pride of your parents. Make them proud of whom you have become, despite the circumstances.

You must heal and allow God to wash over you His unending love. Through healing, He will help you find peace. I am a firm believer that you are of no use to the rest of society until you are restored and in a healthy place. So honor can also mean removing yourself from situations where you do not feel you are strong enough to endure the challenge.

Next post will be the flipside...children who do not honor...

While You Wait

Make sure to check out previous posts that you may or may not have read. My husband and I have had quite an interesting life thus far in only 13 years of marriage and around 17 years of being friends. Check out our adventures in 2006 and 2008. God is good...all the time.

Be blessed.

Stirring Up a Pot

Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses. Proverbs 10:12

In continuation with yesterday's concerns, it is important that we also take the viewpoint of those who grasp the enormity of God's grace and are aware that we all are but sinners saved by that grace ourselves. So the fine line between judgment and correction is tight and delicate. When you are aware that your brother in Christ is not operating in a life that is pleasing to the Lord, it is ON YOU to assist them in seeing how their choices or decisions are not God-honoring. However, it is NOT ON YOU to judge them and to offer punishment to them. Hmmmmm. What?

It's easy with children, right? They are smaller and younger and easier to persuade. It is far less complicated to correct a child as they are still in a place of submission or of fearful respect. When you inform them that a decision they are making is going to harm them or others AND explain how or why that is truth, they tend to begin striving to correct that action. They are still in a place of awareness that pleasing a superior equals a greater reward and less painful existence.

Ah, and then they (we) grow up. The place of pleasing a superior shifts. Our superiors alter. Our desire to strive for correct behavior becomes skewed. For the past several decades, we have watched the embrace of individualism and the push for personal pleasure as opposed to pleasing others. And to an extent, that is not bad. You should be happy. You should work a job that you enjoy. You should marry someone that you want to share a roof with for the rest of your life. Moving away from family arranged marriages and following the footsteps of your father's occupation is not detrimental. Yet, we have now gone to the complete opposite end of the spectrum.

Little regard is given to the effect that our decisions make on those close to us. It's my body; I can do with it as I wish. It's my money; I can spend it as I wish. It's my car; I can drive it how I wish. It's my life; I can live it as I wish.

Now where am I going with this and how does it tie to the passage? We have a plethora of people operating under freedom of choice - given by God and abused by man. With this abuse of liberty, you also have an enormous growth of frustration with those who are hoping to maintain a life clean and pure and free of question. So with those who are struggling to not conform looking upon those who are comfortable in their conformity, we see a rise of hatred and judgment. This just causes more "strife". It often just pushes people further away from grace and mercy.

Yet on the other hand, we have a large population of religious leaders who are extending grace and mercy and scorn judgment as it is only the place of God to issue judgment. So what is right? Whatever you say or do, do it all for the glory of God. WHATEVER. To me this is very black and white. You are not to judge. You are not to furrow your brow and demean people. At the same time, you are not to passively excuse SIN.

"Hey Buddy! I am a sinner and I really struggle with __________. It is hard. Daily, I must make the decision as to whether I am going to ask God to help me with this battle or if I am going to try to take it on myself. Do you deal with any of that?"

or

"Has this behavior brought you closer to God or further away from Him?"

or

"I don't know if I could do that. My strengths are different and it would be a stumble for me. It would probably cause me to lead others to stumble."

or

Just live it.

There are things that you can do to speak truth to your fellow believers that does not give them a rise of hatred towards you or to feel your hatred towards them. Hate the sin...not the sinner. BUT DON'T INGORE IT. God loves them so much and needs you to model a life that is honoring to Him so that they are able to see the difference.

Grace is to be extended. You are not to judge. Do not operate in hate and resentment. But don't be foolish enough to think that your passive acceptance of continual sin is not going to be something you must justify on Judgment Day.

The Hour of Trial

What to say today? I am overwhelmed with the painful topics that are laying before me today and am at a loss as to where to begin. I am heartbroken and anxious over what is going on around me in our world and I do not even see the correct words to speak. Here is what I do know, and here is what we have heard all of our lives as believers.

"'I know your works. Behold, I have set before you an open door, which no one is able to shut. I know that you have but little power, and yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. Behold, I will make those of the synagogue of Satan who say that they are Jews and are not, but lie--behold, I will make them come and bow down before your feet and they will learn that I have loved you. Because you have kept my word about patient endurance, I will keep you from the hour of trial that is coming on the whole world, to try those who dwell on the earth. I am coming soon. Hold fast what you have, so that no one may seize your crown.” Revelations 3:8-11

There is an open door set before every man, woman, and child on earth. This door is open for us to enter. The gift of eternal life is accepted as simply as stepping into the open door. Will we be able to say that we are among those who have kept His word in our heart and have not denied His name? Have we maintained endurance and acknowledged His incredible patience with us? Have we compromised our faith in order to survive, fit in, find peace, and find common ground?

The hour is coming, and I feel that it is sooner than later. Please know that I am not prophesying. I only want to make us alert. Whether Jesus comes back today or 50 years from now, He is coming and we are to be ready and on our guard. I am so broken about what I see happening in our world today not only by those who are professed Unbelievers, but for those who say they are in a growing and progressing relationship with their Creator.

So what do we do? With all of the complicated questions that are being posed to us as believers today, it is even more crucial that you KNOW HIM and KNOW HIS WORD, so that you KNOW THE TRUTH about the questionable matter presented. So many people just shrug their shoulders at controversial issues and say it doesn’t apply to me. It doesn’t? Are you sure? Wow, how things that were trivial and small 10 years ago are enormous today. Little did I know 15 years ago that my family would be plagued with cancer in many ways, so cancer research and the funding of such did not matter to me. It does now.

Yet I am talking about even more difficult matters than funding of hopeful cures. Here is what is before us right now of which you may or may not be trying to make an opinion.

1. World Vision’s decision to hire homosexuals who are in a married relationship. Know that whatever you decide, their decision will set in motion the decision of other organizations.
2. The truth and lies about this enormous missing plane. All sorts of conspiracy theories are arising and though you may not have any involvement in this mess, whatever is truth or lie is vital to what will be truth or lie in the future with other important shocking incidents.
3. Obama’s Healthcare plan
4. Obama’s recent summit with all of the governors
5. Russia’s invasion of Ukraine – YES IT DOES INVOLVE YOU
6. Duck Dynasty’s up and down acceptance because of Phil’s interview (know the full story)
7. Education reform and the compromises being made for socialist structure
8. Abortion reform – they will present you with every complicated angle, so be ready to know what you would say (incest, rape, danger to the mom, danger to both, etc.) And know what you would say if it were you or your daughter.
9. Legalization of narcotics – it’s coming (remember prohibition didn’t work for long)
10. Elevated debt to meet the needs of the needy – what does God say about your finances (and our government’s finances)? What does God say about tending to the needy? Who are the needy according to scripture?
11. Our acceptance of words that are unpleasant and sights that is unpleasant on the television. You know if you watch, than they assume you accept it.

The world right now scares me. I have 2 little ones to raise and I know that it will only be more challenging for them. We must be on our guard. We must know His word. For His patience will eventually wear out and will we be able to say that we did all that we could to make His name, His Word, His will known so that all will be aware that the choices they have made were informed choices. You must know so that they will know.