Thursday, March 20, 2014

I Know That You Are For Me

There is irony and appropriateness in so many things that happen in our life. Have you ever taken time to evaluate the various aspects of your life? This morning is a morning of reflection for me. As you might notice, I am a thinker and an inside processor. I tend to not speak until I have chewed on my thoughts for a certain amount of time...unless I am in time of heightened emotion like I mentioned in my previous post. That's never good. :) Today is my birthday and some people awaken on this day with dread because yep, you are another year closer to death. Some people wake up on this day with excitement ready to conquer the world with enthusiasm and celebration. Some people awaken and see it as just another day. Some people awaken with reflection of the years gone by.

I am a little of all, well, except the death dread. I love life. I especially love the Giver of life and I am aware that the days I have had and will continue to have are numbered. And no, I am not one of those who thinks it would be neat to know how many more days I have left. I would spend the remainder of my time cramming activities and having anxiety attacks about what activity I am not going to get to do and what person I am not going to get to spend enough time with. That would just be way too much for me.

But I do love life. I love it because I have been blessed. So as I awaken this morning and reflect back upon the years I have taken up space on this earth, I cannot help but spend time reflecting over all that has happened to me and around me. I cannot help but see this GIANT hand pushing, pulling, lifting, shielding, holding, comforting, scolding, protecting, sustaining, healing, leading me through all of my adventures that I have had.

Oh Father, how thankful that I am given the chance to see your work in my life. I know that many go through life's journey with the question "why?" hovering over their head constantly. I know that you are present in every storm and every stillness. I know that you are holding the answers to why and will always answer in due time. I am blessed to be able to see your hand moving in and through me as I exercise my freedom of choice of which you have extended to me. Thank you for listening to specific pleas over these past years and not just answering them, but fulfilling them until my cup runneth over. My "why" that I am often plagued with is why do you find me worthy to exert any blessing upon? I fail you. I disappoint you. I make bad choices. I wrestle with things causing you to have to reach down and rescue me when I shouldn't have even approached that bear at all. I would like to share with the readers how I know that You are for me as I look back and am overwhelmed by where you have blessed me. I pray that today, on my day of birth, the day I celebrate with great enthusiasm, it is clear I want to celebrate not me, but YOU! Thank you God for

1. saving me at a young age
2. allowing me to be born in a home with not one, but two parents who fear you and serve you
3. giving me access to a Bible and freedom to worship You whenever and wherever I want because men who went before me 238 years ago found it important to protect this freedom
4. good Christian friends throughout my life to pray with me, challenge me, speak on behalf of you to me
5. the drive and determination that you give me to grow
6. the gift of discernment
7. the ability to curl up in your lap and just talk and then to LISTEN
8. the MANY times I have audibly heard you speak to me
9. a good education
10. a university that assisted me in my growth both in knowledge and wisdom of this world AND knowledge and wisdom of you
11. a man to come alongside me and lead my family by his faith in You
12. supportive extended family who have always made us feel like we are loved and encouraged
13. two beautiful children when we thought we could have none
14. healing of my husband countless times over his life, but even specifically the MIRACLES you have performed in his life since we have been married
15. 27 years with a mother who was INCREDIBLE and modeled for me and an entire community what is it like to know that You are for me. (this blessing deserves about 10 more posts alone)
16. grandparents and great grandparents and beyond who raised my parents to fear and love you so that they could pour that same life of adoration into me
17. a brother who is one of my biggest fans and a cherished friend and an incredibly intelligent and insightful role model
18. In-laws who love the Lord and love me and make me feel like I am there child too
19. a career choice that allows me to exercise the gifts that you have given to me
20. jobs that have allowed me to cross paths with some of the most AMAZING people and have taken care of me during many of our storms
21. doctors just in time
22. a child who is already whole with my mother in Heaven and the peace to let it go
23. a roof over my head with heat and air conditioning
24. the physical ability to run and the great relief it gives as I am alone with you and restoring my body.
25. time

Kari Jobe is one of my favorite Christian artists and she has a song that I sing at the top of my lungs in the car with my girls. Here are parts of the lyrics. I pray that today, on this first day of Spring - the season that is of new beginnings - you are able to see where He has been with you in the past and you are able to take a deep breath and step forward with confidence to know that He is with you always. ALWAYS

So faithful
So constant
So loving and so true
So powerful in all You do

You fill me
You see me
You know my every move
You love for me to sing to You

I know that You are for me
I know that You are for me
I know that You will never
Forsake me in my weakness

And I know that You have come now
Even if to write upon my heart
To remind me who You are

So patient
So gracious
So merciful and true
So wonderful in all You do

Be blessed today! Happy Spring!

1 comment:

Mama B said...

Happy Birthday friend!!